Війна і мир

Chapter 10

           NowIrecalledeverydetailofthatmeetingandinmymindgavehimthemostmalevolentandbitterreplies.IrecollectedmyselfanddroveawaythatthoughtonlywhenIfoundmyselfglowingwithanger,butIdidnotsufficientlyrepent.AfterwardsBorísDrubetskóycameandbeganrelatingvariousadventures.Hiscomingvexedmefromthefirst,andIsaidsomethingdisagreeabletohim.Hereplied.Iflaredupandsaidmuchthatwasunpleasantandevenrudetohim.Hebecamesilent,andIrecollectedmyselfonlywhenitwastoolate.MyGod,Icannotgetonwithhimatall.Thecauseofthisismyegotism.Isetmyselfabovehimandsobecomemuchworsethanhe,forheislenienttomyrudenesswhileIonthecontrarynourishcontemptforhim.OGod,grantthatinhispresenceImayratherseemyownvileness,andbehavesothathetoomaybenefit.AfterdinnerIfellasleepandasIwasdrowsingoffIclearlyheardavoicesayinginmyleftear,“Thyday!”

           IdreamedthatIwaswalkinginthedarkandwassuddenlysurroundedbydogs,butIwentonundismayed.Suddenlyasmallishdogseizedmyleftthighwithitsteethandwouldnotletgo.Ibegantothrottleitwithmyhands.ScarcelyhadItornitoffbeforeanother,abiggerone,beganbitingme.Ilifteditup,butthehigherIlifteditthebiggerandheavieritgrew.AndsuddenlyBrotherA.cameand,takingmyarm,ledmetoabuildingtoenterwhichwehadtopassalonganarrowplank.Isteppedonit,butitbentandgavewayandIbegantoclamberupafencewhichIcouldscarcelyreachwithmyhands.

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