Chapter 21

           

           FromthemomentwhenAlexeyAlexandrovitchunderstoodfromhisinterviewswithBetsyandwithStepanArkadyevitchthatallthatwasexpectedofhimwastoleavehiswifeinpeace,withoutburdeningherwithhispresence,andthathiswifeherselfdesiredthis,hefeltsodistraughtthathecouldcometonodecisionofhimself;hedidnotknowhimselfwhathewantednow,andputtinghimselfinthehandsofthosewhoweresopleasedtointerestthemselvesinhisaffairs,hemeteverythingwithunqualifiedassent.ItwasonlywhenAnnahadlefthishouse,andtheEnglishgovernesssenttoaskhimwhethersheshoulddinewithhimorseparately,thatforthefirsttimeheclearlycomprehendedhisposition,andwasappalledbyit.Mostdifficultofallinthispositionwasthefactthathecouldnotinanywayconnectandreconcilehispastwithwhatwasnow.Itwasnotthepastwhenhehadlivedhappilywithhiswifethattroubledhim.Thetransitionfromthatpasttoaknowledgeofhiswife’sunfaithfulnesshehadlivedthroughmiserablyalready;thatstatewaspainful,buthecouldunderstandit.Ifhiswifehadthen,ondeclaringtohimherunfaithfulness,lefthim,hewouldhavebeenwounded,unhappy,buthewouldnothavebeeninthehopelesspositionincomprehensibletohimselfinwhichhefelthimselfnow.

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