Chapter 27

           

           Afterthelessonwiththegrammarteachercamehisfather’slesson.Whilewaitingforhisfather,Seryozhasatatthetableplayingwithapenknife,andfelltodreaming.AmongSeryozha’sfavoriteoccupationswassearchingforhismotherduringhiswalks.Hedidnotbelieveindeathgenerally,andinherdeathinparticular,inspiteofwhatLidiaIvanovnahadtoldhimandhisfatherhadconfirmed,anditwasjustbecauseofthat,andafterhehadbeentoldshewasdead,thathehadbegunlookingforherwhenoutforawalk.Everywomanoffull,gracefulfigurewithdarkhairwashismother.Atthesightofsuchawomansuchafeelingoftendernesswasstirredwithinhimthathisbreathfailedhim,andtearscameintohiseyes.Andhewasonthetiptoeofexpectationthatshewouldcomeuptohim,wouldliftherveil.Allherfacewouldbevisible,shewouldsmile,shewouldhughim,hewouldsniffherfragrance,feelthesoftnessofherarms,andcrywithhappiness,justashehadoneeveninglainonherlapwhileshetickledhim,andhelaughedandbitherwhite,ring-coveredfingers.Later,whenheaccidentallylearnedfromhisoldnursethathismotherwasnotdead,andhisfatherandLidiaIvanovnahadexplainedtohimthatshewasdeadtohimbecauseshewaswicked(whichhecouldnotpossiblybelieve,becausehelovedher),hewentonseekingherandexpectingherinthesameway.Thatdayinthepublicgardenstherehadbeenaladyinalilacveil,whomhehadwatchedwithathrobbingheart,believingittobesheasshecametowardsthemalongthepath.

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