Крошка Доррит

Chapter 5. Family Affairs

           

           ‘Isitpossible,mother,’hersonleanedforwardtobethenearertoherwhilehewhisperedit,andlaidhishandnervouslyuponherdesk,‘isitpossible,mother,thathehadunhappilywrongedanyone,andmadenoreparation?’

           Lookingathimwrathfully,shebentherselfbackinherchairtokeephimfurtheroff,butgavehimnoreply.

           ‘Iamdeeplysensible,mother,thatifthisthoughthasneveratanytimeflasheduponyou,itmustseemcruelandunnaturalinme,eveninthisconfidence,tobreatheit.ButIcannotshakeitoff.Timeandchange(Ihavetriedbothbeforebreakingsilence)donothingtowearitout.Remember,Iwaswithmyfather.Remember,Isawhisfacewhenhegavethewatchintomykeeping,andstruggledtoexpressthathesentitasatokenyouwouldunderstand,toyou.Remember,Isawhimatthelastwiththepencilinhisfailinghand,tryingtowritesomewordforyoutoread,buttowhichhecouldgivenoshape.ThemoreremoteandcruelthisvaguesuspicionthatIhave,thestrongerthecircumstancesthatcouldgiveitanysemblanceofprobabilitytome.ForHeaven’ssake,letusexaminesacredlywhetherthereisanywrongentrustedtoustosetright.Noonecanhelptowardsit,mother,butyou.’

           Stillsorecoilinginherchairthatheroverpoisedweightmovedit,fromtimetotime,alittleonitswheels,andgavehertheappearanceofaphantomoffierceaspectglidingawayfromhim,sheinterposedherleftarm,bentattheelbowwiththebackofherhandtowardsherface,betweenherselfandhim,andlookedathiminafixedsilence.

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