Джейн Ейр

Chapter XXXI

           Hedidloveme—noonewilleverlovemesoagain. Ishallnevermoreknowthesweethomagegiventobeauty,youth,andgrace—fornevertoanyoneelseshallIseemtopossessthesecharms. Hewasfondandproudofme—itiswhatnomanbesideswilleverbe. —ButwhereamIwandering,andwhatamIsaying,andaboveall,feeling?Whetherisitbetter,Iask,tobeaslaveinafool’sparadiseatMarseilles—feveredwithdelusiveblissonehour—suffocatingwiththebitteresttearsofremorseandshamethenext—ortobeavillage-schoolmistress,freeandhonest,inabreezymountainnookinthehealthyheartofEngland? 

           Yes;IfeelnowthatIwasrightwhenIadheredtoprincipleandlaw,andscornedandcrushedtheinsanepromptingsofafrenziedmoment. Goddirectedmetoacorrectchoice:IthankHisprovidencefortheguidance! 

           Havingbroughtmyeventidemusingstothispoint,Irose,wenttomydoor,andlookedatthesunsetoftheharvest-day,andatthequietfieldsbeforemycottage,which,withtheschool,wasdistanthalfamilefromthevillage. Thebirdsweresingingtheirlaststrains— 

           "Theairwasmild,thedewwasbalm." 

           WhileIlooked,Ithoughtmyselfhappy,andwassurprisedtofindmyselferelongweeping—andwhy? Forthedoomwhichhadreftmefromadhesiontomymaster:forhimIwasnomoretosee;forthedesperategriefandfatalfury—consequencesofmydeparture—whichmightnow,perhaps,bedragginghimfromthepathofright,toofartoleavehopeofultimaterestorationthither. 

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