Джейн Ейр

Chapter XXX

           Incommunicativeashewas,sometimeelapsedbeforeIhadanopportunityofgauginghismind.IfirstgotanideaofitscalibrewhenIheardhimpreachinhisownchurchatMorton. IwishIcoulddescribethatsermon:butitispastmypower. Icannotevenrenderfaithfullytheeffectitproducedonme. 

           Itbegancalm—andindeed,asfarasdeliveryandpitchofvoicewent,itwascalmtotheend: anearnestlyfelt,yetstrictlyrestrainedzealbreathedsooninthedistinctaccents,andpromptedthenervouslanguage. Thisgrewtoforce—compressed,condensed,controlled. Theheartwasthrilled,themindastonished,bythepowerofthepreacher:neitherweresoftened. Throughouttherewasastrangebitterness;anabsenceofconsolatorygentleness;sternallusionstoCalvinisticdoctrines—election,predestination,reprobation—werefrequent;andeachreferencetothesepointssoundedlikeasentencepronouncedfordoom. Whenhehaddone,insteadoffeelingbetter,calmer,moreenlightenedbyhisdiscourse,Iexperiencedaninexpressiblesadness;foritseemedtome—Iknownotwhetherequallysotoothers—thattheeloquencetowhichIhadbeenlisteninghadsprungfromadepthwherelayturbiddregsofdisappointment—wheremovedtroublingimpulsesofinsatiateyearningsanddisquietingaspirations. 

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