Американская трагедия

Chapter 34

           HisdesireformoremorethatintensedesirehehadfeltthereinLycurgusafterSondracameandnowthis,this!AndnoweventhiswasendingthisthisWhy,hehadscarcelylivedatallasyetandtheselasttwoyearssomiserablybetweenthesecrushingwalls.Andofthislifebutfourteen,thirteen,twelve,eleven,ten,nine,eightofthefilteringandnowfeverishdaysleft.Theyweregoinggoing.Butlifelifehowwasonetodowithoutthatthebeautyofthedaysofthesunandrainofworklove,energy,desire.Oh,hereallydidnotwanttodie.Hedidnot.WhysaytohimsoconstantlyashismotherandtheReverendMcMillannowdidtoresolveallhiscareindivinemercyandthinkonlyofGod,whennow,now,wasall?AndyettheReverendMcMillaninsistingthatonlyinChristandthehereafterwasrealpeace.Oh,yesbutjustthesame,beforetheGovernormighthenothavesaidmighthenothavesaidthathewasnotguiltyoratleastnotentirelyguiltyifonlyhehadseenitthatwaythattimeandthenthenwhythentheGovernormighthavecommutedhissentencetolifeimprisonmentmighthenot?ForhehadaskedhismotherwhattheReverendMcMillanhadsaidtotheGovernor—(yetwithoutsayingtoherthathehadeverconfessedalltohim),andshehadrepliedthathehadtoldhimhowsincerelyhehadhumbledhimselfbeforetheLordbutnotthathewasnotguilty.

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