Американская трагедия

Chapter 33

           Eveninthefaceofallthefactsandasmuchaseveryonefelthimtobeguilty,therewassomethingsodeepwithinhimthatseemedtocryoutagainstitthat,evennow,attimes,itstartledhim.Still—therewastheReverendMcMillan—hewasaveryfairandjustandmercifulman.Surelyhesawallthisfromahigherlightandbetterviewpointthanhisown.Whileattimeshefeltstronglythathewasinnocent,atothershefeltthathemustbeguilty.

           Oh,theseevasiveandtangledandtorturesomethoughts!!Wouldheneverbeable—quite—togetthewholethingstraightenedoutinhisownmind?

           SoClydenotbeingabletotakeadvantagetrulyofeitherthetendernessandfaithanddevotionofsogoodandpureasoulastheReverendMcMillanortheallmercifulandallpowerfulGodofwhomherehestoodastheambassador.Whatwashetodo,really?Howpray,resignedly,unreservedly,faithfully?Andinthatmood—andbecauseoftheurgeoftheReverendDuncan,whowasconvincedbyClyde’sconfessionthathemusthavebeencompletelyinfusedwiththespiritofGod,oncemorethumbingthroughthevariouspassagesandchapterspointedouttohim—readingandre-readingthePsalmsmostfamiliartohim,seekingfromtheirinspirationtocatchthenecessarycontrition—whichoncecaughtwouldgivehimthatpeaceandstrengthwhichinthoselonganddrearyhourshesomuchdesired.Yetneverquitecatchingit.

           Parallelwithallthis,fourmoremonthspassed.

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