Лавка древностей

Chapter 69

           IshouldhavebeenagreatdealmoremiserablethanIwas,ifithadn’tbeenforyou.’

           Goodnessgracious,howprettyBarbarawaswhenshecoloured—andwhenshetrembled,likealittleshrinkingbird!

           ‘Iamtellingyouthetruth,Barbara,uponmyword,butnothalfsostrongasIcouldwish,’saidKit.‘WhenIwantyoutobepleasedtoseeMissNell,it’sonlybecauseIlikeyoutobepleasedwithwhatpleasesme—that’sall.Astoher,Barbara,IthinkIcouldalmostdietodoherservice,butyouwouldthinksotoo,ifyouknewherasIdo.Iamsureyouwould.’

           Barbarawastouched,andsorrytohaveappearedindifferent.

           ‘Ihavebeenused,yousee,’saidKit,‘totalkandthinkofher,almostasifshewasanangel.WhenIlookforwardtomeetingheragain,Ithinkofhersmilingassheusedtodo,andbeinggladtoseeme,andputtingoutherhandandsaying,“It’smyownoldKit,”orsomesuchwordsasthose—likewhatsheusedtosay.Ithinkofseeingherhappy,andwithfriendsabouther,andbroughtupasshedeserves,andassheoughttobe.WhenIthinkofmyself,it’sasheroldservant,andonethatlovedherdearly,ashiskind,good,gentlemistress;andwhowouldhavegone—yes,andstillwouldgo—throughanyharmtoserveher.Once,Icouldn’thelpbeingafraidthatifshecamebackwithfriendsabouthershemightforget,orbeashamedofhavingknown,ahumbleladlikeme,andsomightspeakcoldly,whichwouldhavecutme,Barbara,deeperthanIcantell.

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