Chapter XXXIV. The Grind Of The Millstones: A Sample Of Chaff

           

           CarrieponderedoverthissituationasconsistentlyasHurstwood,onceshegotthefactsadjustedinhermind.Ittookseveraldaysforhertofullyrealisethattheapproachofthedissolutionofherhusband’sbusinessmeantcommonplacestruggleandprivation.HermindwentbacktoherearlyventureinChicago,theHansonsandtheirflat,andherheartrevolted.Thatwasterrible!Everythingaboutpovertywasterrible.Shewishedsheknewawayout.HerrecentexperienceswiththeVanceshadwhollyunfittedhertoviewherownstatewithcomplacence.Theglamourofthehighlifeofthecityhad,inthefewexperiencesaffordedherbytheformer,seizedhercompletely.Shehadbeentaughthowtodressandwheretogowithouthavingamplemeanstodoeither.Now,thesethings—ever-presentrealitiesastheywere—filledhereyesandmind.Themorecircumscribedbecameherstate,themoreentrancingseemedthisother.AndnowpovertythreatenedtoseizeherentirelyandtoremovethisotherworldfarupwardlikeaheaventowhichanyLazarusmightextend,appealingly,hishands.

           So,too,theidealbroughtintoherlifebyAmesremained.Hehadgone,butherewashiswordthatricheswerenoteverything;thattherewasagreatdealmoreintheworldthansheknew;thatthestagewasgood,andtheliteratureshereadpoor.Hewasastrongmanandclean—howmuchstrongerandbetterthanHurstwoodandDrouetsheonlyhalfformulatedtoherself,butthedifferencewaspainful.Itwassomethingtowhichshevoluntarilyclosedhereyes.

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