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Chapter 12

           

           “Idon’tunderstandyourthoughts,LizabethaProkofievna;butIcanseethatthefactofmyhavingwrittenisforsomereasonrepugnanttoyou.YoumustadmitthatIhaveaperfectrighttorefusetoansweryourquestions;but,inordertoshowyouthatIamneitherashamedoftheletter,norsorrythatIwroteit,andthatIamnotintheleastinclinedtoblushaboutit”(heretheprince’sblushesredoubled),“Iwillrepeatthesubstanceofmyletter,forIthinkIknowitalmostbyheart.”

           Sosaying,theprincerepeatedtheletteralmostwordforword,ashehadwrittenit.

           “Mygoodness,whatuttertwaddle,andwhatmayallthisnonsensehavesignified,pray?Ifithadanymeaningatall!”saidMrs.Epanchin,cuttingly,afterhavinglistenedwithgreatattention.

           “Ireallydon’tabsolutelyknowmyself;Iknowmyfeelingwasverysincere.Ihadmomentsatthattimefulloflifeandhope.”

           “Whatsortofhope?”

           “Itisdifficulttoexplain,butcertainlynotthehopesyouhaveinyourmind.Hopeswell,inaword,hopesforthefuture,andafeelingofjoythatthere,atallevents,Iwasnotentirelyastrangerandaforeigner.Ifeltanecstasyinbeinginmynativelandoncemore;andonesunnymorningItookupapenandwroteherthatletter,butwhytoher,Idon’tquiteknow.Sometimesonelongstohaveafriendnear,andIevidentlyfelttheneedofonethen,”addedtheprince,andpaused.

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