Американская трагедия

Chapter 33

           I—I—"Inhisuniformhishaircroppedsoclose,Clydesatthere,tryinghonestlynowtothinkhowitreallywas(exactly)andgreatlytroubledbyhisinabilitytodemonstratetohimselfeveneitherhisguiltorhislackofguilt.Washeorwashenot?AndtheReverendMcMillanhimselfintenselystrained,muttering:"Wideisthegateandbroadthewaythatleadethtodestruction."Andyetfinallyadding:"Butyoudidrisetosaveher."

           "Yes,afterwards,Igotup.Imeanttocatchheraftershefellback.Thatwaswhatupsettheboat."

           "Andyoudidreallywanttocatchher?"

           "Idon’tknow.AtthemomentIguessIdid.AnyhowIfeltsorry,Ithink."

           "Butcanyousaynowtrulyandpositively,asyourCreatorseesyou,thatyouweresorryorthatyouwantedtosaveherthen?"

           "Itallhappenedsoquick,yousee,"beganClydenervouslyhopelessly,almost,"thatI’mnotjustsure.No,Idon’tknowthatIwassoverysorry.No.Ireallydon’tknow,yousee,now.SometimesIthinkmaybeIwas,alittle,sometimesnot,maybe.ButaftershewasgoneandIwasonshore,Ifeltsorryalittle.ButIwassortofglad,too,youknow,tobefree,andyetfrightened,tooYousee—"

           "Yes,Iknow.YouweregoingtothatMissX.Butoutthere,whenshewasinthewater—?"

           "No."

           "Youdidnotwanttogotoherrescue?"

           "No.

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