Злочин та покарання

Chapter 5

           

           “AfterIt,”heshouted,jumpingupfromtheseat,“butisItreallygoingtohappen?Isitpossibleitreallywillhappen?”Helefttheseat,andwentoffalmostatarun;hemeanttoturnback,homewards,butthethoughtofgoinghomesuddenlyfilledhimwithintenseloathing;inthathole,inthatawfullittlecupboardofhis,allthishadforamonthpastbeengrowingupinhim;andhewalkedonatrandom.

           Hisnervousshudderhadpassedintoafeverthatmadehimfeelshivering;inspiteoftheheathefeltcold.Withakindofefforthebeganalmostunconsciously,fromsomeinnercraving,tostareatalltheobjectsbeforehim,asthoughlookingforsomethingtodistracthisattention;buthedidnotsucceed,andkeptdroppingeverymomentintobrooding.Whenwithastartheliftedhisheadagainandlookedround,heforgotatoncewhathehadjustbeenthinkingaboutandevenwherehewasgoing.InthiswayhewalkedrightacrossVassilyevskyOstrov,cameoutontotheLesserNeva,crossedthebridgeandturnedtowardstheislands.Thegreennessandfreshnesswereatfirstrestfultohiswearyeyesafterthedustofthetownandthehugehousesthathemmedhiminandweigheduponhim.Heretherewerenotaverns,nostiflingcloseness,nostench.Butsoonthesenewpleasantsensationspassedintomorbidirritability.Sometimeshestoodstillbeforeabrightlypaintedsummervillastandingamonggreenfoliage,hegazedthroughthefence,hesawinthedistancesmartlydressedwomenontheverandahsandbalconies,andchildrenrunninginthegardens.

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