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Chapter 12. In which a Great Patriotic Conference is holden

           Iftheguestschosetopartakeofwhatwasserved,hesawnoobjection;butitwasservedforthemaintenanceofhisrank.Ashestoodbythesideboardheseemedtoannounce,‘Ihaveacceptedofficetolookatthiswhichisnowbeforeme,andtolookatnothinglessthanthis.’Ifhemissedthepresidingbosom,itwasasapartofhisownstateofwhichhewas,fromunavoidablecircumstances,temporarilydeprived,justashemighthavemissedacentre-piece,orachoicewine-cooler,whichhadbeensenttotheBanker’s.

           MrMerdleissuedinvitationsforaBarnacledinner.LordDecimuswastobethere,MrTiteBarnaclewastobethere,thepleasantyoungBarnaclewastobethere;andtheChorusofParliamentaryBarnacleswhowentabouttheprovinceswhentheHousewasup,warblingthepraisesoftheirChief,weretoberepresentedthere.Itwasunderstoodtobeagreatoccasion.MrMerdlewasgoingtotakeuptheBarnacles.SomedelicatelittlenegotiationshadoccurredbetweenhimandthenobleDecimus—theyoungBarnacleofengagingmannersactingasnegotiator—andMrMerdlehaddecidedtocasttheweightofhisgreatprobityandgreatrichesintotheBarnaclescale.Jobberywassuspectedbythemalicious;perhapsbecauseitwasindisputablethatiftheadherenceoftheimmortalEnemyofMankindcouldhavebeensecuredbyajob,theBarnacleswouldhavejobbedhim—forthegoodofthecountry,forthegoodofthecountry.

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