Chapter XXX

           

           ButthebedImadeupformyselfwassufficientlyuncomfortabletogivemeawakefulnight,andIthoughtagooddealofwhattheunluckyDutchmanhadtoldme.IwasnotsomuchpuzzledbyBlancheStroeve’saction,forIsawinthatmerelytheresultofaphysicalappeal.Idonotsupposeshehadeverreallycaredforherhusband,andwhatIhadtakenforlovewasnomorethanthefeminineresponsetocaressesandcomfortwhichinthemindsofmostwomenpassesforit.Itisapassivefeelingcapableofbeingrousedforanyobject,asthevinecangrowonanytree;andthewisdomoftheworldrecognisesitsstrengthwheniturgesagirltomarrythemanwhowantsherwiththeassurancethatlovewillfollow.Itisanemotionmadeupofthesatisfactioninsecurity,prideofproperty,thepleasureofbeingdesired,thegratificationofahousehold,anditisonlybyanamiablevanitythatwomenascribetoitspiritualvalue.Itisanemotionwhichisdefencelessagainstpassion.IsuspectedthatBlancheStroeve’sviolentdislikeofStricklandhadinitfromthebeginningavagueelementofsexualattraction.WhoamIthatIshouldseektounravelthemysteriousintricaciesofsex?PerhapsStroeve’spassionexcitedwithoutsatisfyingthatpartofhernature,andshehatedStricklandbecauseshefeltinhimthepowertogiveherwhatsheneeded.Ithinkshewasquitesincerewhenshestruggledagainstherhusband’sdesiretobringhimintothestudio;Ithinkshewasfrightenedofhim,thoughsheknewnotwhy;andIrememberedhowshehadforeseendisaster.

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