Холодний дім

Esther’s Narrative

           HowcanwestandamazedatpoorRick?Ayoungmansounfortunate,"herehefellintoalowertone,asifhewerethinkingaloud,"cannotatfirstbelieve(whocould?)thatChanceryiswhatitis.Helookstoit,flushedandfitfully,todosomethingwithhisinterestsandbringthemtosomesettlement.Itprocrastinates,disappoints,tries,tortureshim;wearsouthissanguinehopesandpatience,threadbythread;buthestilllookstoit,andhankersafterit,andfindshiswholeworldtreacherousandhollow.Well,well,well!Enoughofthis,mydear!"Hehadsupportedme,asatfirst,allthistime,andhistendernesswassoprecioustomethatIleanedmyheaduponhisshoulderandlovedhimasifhehadbeenmyfather.Iresolvedinmyownmindinthislittlepause,bysomemeans,toseeRichardwhenIgrewstrongandtrytosethimright."Therearebettersubjectsthanthese,"saidmyguardian,"forsuchajoyfultimeasthetimeofourdeargirl’srecovery.AndIhadacommissiontobroachoneofthemassoonasIshouldbegintotalk.WhenshallAdacometoseeyou,mylove?"Ihadbeenthinkingofthattoo.Alittleinconnexionwiththeabsentmirrors,butnotmuch,forIknewmylovinggirlwouldbechangedbynochangeinmylooks."Dearguardian,"saidI,"asIhaveshutheroutsolongthoughindeed,indeed,sheislikethelighttome""Iknowitwell,DameDurden,well."Hewassogood,histouchexpressedsuchendearingcompassionandaffection,andthetoneofhisvoicecarriedsuchcomfortintomyheartthatIstoppedforalittlewhile,quiteunabletogoon."Yes,yes,youaretired,"saidhe.

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