Холодний дім

Esther’s Narrative

           "Don’tyoubealarmed,MissSummerson,onaccountofourcomingdownhere,"hesaid,turningtome."Ionlywanttohaveeverythingintrainandtoknowthatitisintrainbylookingafteritmyself.Geton,mylad!"Weappearedtoretracethewaywehadcome.NotthatIhadtakennoteofanyparticularobjectsinmyperturbedstateofmind,butjudgingfromthegeneralcharacterofthestreets.Wecalledatanotherofficeorstationforaminuteandcrossedtheriveragain.Duringthewholeofthistime,andduringthewholesearch,mycompanion,wrappeduponthebox,neverrelaxedinhisvigilanceasinglemoment;butwhenwecrossedthebridgeheseemed,ifpossible,tobemoreonthealertthanbefore.Hestooduptolookovertheparapet,healightedandwentbackafterashadowyfemalefigurethatflittedpastus,andhegazedintotheprofoundblackpitofwaterwithafacethatmademyheartdiewithinme.Theriverhadafearfullook,soovercastandsecret,creepingawaysofastbetweenthelowflatlinesofshoresoheavywithindistinctandawfulshapes,bothofsubstanceandshadow;sodeath-likeandmysterious.Ihaveseenitmanytimessincethen,bysunlightandbymoonlight,butneverfreefromtheimpressionsofthatjourney.Inmymemorythelightsuponthebridgearealwaysburningdim,thecuttingwindiseddyingroundthehomelesswomanwhomwepass,themonotonouswheelsarewhirlingon,andthelightofthecarriage-lampsreflectedbacklookspalelyinuponmeafacerisingoutofthedreadedwater.

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