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Chapter 38

           Scarletthadfoundthatadrinkofneatbrandybeforesupperhelpedimmeasurablyandshewouldalwayschewcoffeeorgarglecolognetodisguisethesmell.Whywerepeoplesosillyaboutwomendrinking,whenmencouldanddidgetreelingdrunkwhenevertheywantedto?SometimeswhenFranklaysnoringbesideherandsleepwouldnotcome,whenshelaytossing,tornwithfearsofpoverty,dreadingtheYankees,homesickforTaraandyearningforAshley,shethoughtshewouldgocrazywereitnotforthebrandybottle.Andwhenthepleasantfamiliarwarmthstolethroughherveins,hertroublesbegantofade.Afterthreedrinks,shecouldalwayssaytoherself:"I’llthinkofthesethingstomorrowwhenIcanstandthembetter."

           Butthereweresomenightswhenevenbrandywouldnotstilltheacheinherheart,theachethatwasevenstrongerthanfearoflosingthemills,theachetoseeTaraagain.Atlanta,withitsnoises,itsnewbuildings,itsstrangefaces,itsnarrowstreetscrowdedwithhorsesandwagonsandbustlingcrowdssometimesseemedtostifleher.ShelovedAtlantabutoh,forthesweetpeaceandcountryquietofTara,theredfieldsandthedarkpinesaboutit!Oh,tobebackatTara,nomatterhowhardthelifemightbe!AndtobenearAshley,justtoseehim,tohearhimspeak,tobesustainedbytheknowledgeofhislove!EachletterfromMelanie,sayingthattheywerewell,eachbriefnotefromWillreportingabouttheplowing,theplanting,thegrowingofthecottonmadeherlonganewtobehomeagain.

           I’llgohomeinJune

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