Мартін Іден

Chapter 30

           "Yes.Fatherhasoffered" 

           "Iunderstandallthat,"hebrokein; "butwhatIwanttoknowiswhetherornotyouhavelostfaithinme?" 

           Shepressedhishandmutely,hereyesdim. 

           "Inyourwriting,dear,"sheadmittedinahalf-whisper. 

           "You’vereadlotsofmystuff,"hewentonbrutally. "Whatdoyouthinkofit? Isitutterlyhopeless? Howdoesitcomparewithothermen’swork?" 

           "Buttheyselltheirs,andyoudon’t." 

           "Thatdoesn’tanswermyquestion. Doyouthinkthatliteratureisnotatallmyvocation?" 

           "ThenIwillanswer." Shesteeledherselftodoit. "Idon’tthinkyouweremadetowrite. Forgiveme,dear. Youcompelmetosayit; andyouknowIknowmoreaboutliteraturethanyoudo." 

           "Yes,youareaBachelorofArts,"hesaidmeditatively; "andyououghttoknow." 

           "Butthereismoretobesaid,"hecontinued,afterapausepainfultoboth. "IknowwhatIhaveinme. NooneknowsthatsowellasI. IknowIshallsucceed. Iwillnotbekeptdown. IamafirewithwhatIhavetosayinverse,andfiction,andessay. Idonotaskyoutohavefaithinthat,though. Idonotaskyoutohavefaithinme,norinmywriting. WhatIdoaskofyouistolovemeandhavefaithinlove." 

           "AyearagoIbelievedfortwoyears. Oneofthoseyearsisyettorun. AndIdobelieve,uponmyhonorandmysoul,thatbeforethatyearisrunIshallhavesucceeded. Yourememberwhatyoutoldmelongago,thatImustservemyapprenticeshiptowriting. 

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