Мартин Иден

Chapter 19

           Againhermotherwaited. "Heinterestsme,Isuppose,likethebulldog. Andthereismuchgoodinhim,too; butthereismuchinhimthatIwouldnotlikeinintheotherway. Yousee,Ihavebeenthinking. Heswears,hesmokes,hedrinks,hehasfoughtwithhisfists(hehastoldmeso,andhelikesit; hesaysso). HeisallthatamanshouldnotbeamanIwouldwantformy"hervoicesankverylow"husband. Thenheistoostrong. Myprincemustbetall,andslender,anddarkagraceful,bewitchingprince. No,thereisnodangerofmyfailinginlovewithMartinEden. Itwouldbetheworstfatethatcouldbefallme." 

           "ButitisnotthatthatIspokeabout,"hermotherequivocated. "Haveyouthoughtabouthim? Heissoineligibleineveryway,youknow,andsupposeheshouldcometoloveyou?" 

           "Buthedoesalready,"shecried. 

           "Itwastobeexpected,"Mrs.Morsesaidgently. "Howcoulditbeotherwisewithanyonewhoknewyou?" 

           "Olneyhatesme!"sheexclaimedpassionately."AndIhateOlney. Ifeelalwayslikeacatwhenheisaround. IfeelthatImustbenastytohim,andevenwhenIdon’thappentofeelthatway,why,he’snastytome,anyway. ButIamhappywithMartinEden. Nooneeverlovedmebeforenoman,Imean,inthatway. Anditissweettobelovedthatway. YouknowwhatImean,motherdear. Itissweettofeelthatyouarereallyandtrulyawoman." Sheburiedherfaceinhermother’slap,sobbing. "YouthinkIamdreadful,Iknow,butIamhonest,andItellyoujusthowIfeel." 

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