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Chapter 32

           Suppose—oh,terriblethought!—supposehehadcompletelyforgottenaboutherandwaschasingaftersomeotherwoman.

           "IwantyoumorethanIhaveeverwantedanywoman...."

           Scarlett’snailsdugintoherpalmsassheclenchedherfists."Ifhe’sforgottenme,I’llmakehimrememberme.I’llmakehimwantmeagain."

           And,ifhewouldnotmarryherbutstillwantedher,therewasawaytogetthemoney.Afterall,hehadonceaskedhertobehismistress.

           Inthedimgraynessoftheparlorshefoughtaquickdecisivebattlewiththethreemostbindingtiesofhersoul—thememoryofEllen,theteachingsofherreligionandherloveforAshley.Sheknewthatwhatshehadinhermindmustbehideoustohermothereveninthatwarmfar-offHeavenwhereshesurelywas.Sheknewthatfornicationwasamortalsin.Andsheknewthat,lovingAshleyasshedid,herplanwasdoublyprostitution.

           Butallthesethingswentdownbeforethemercilesscoldnessofhermindandthegoadofdesperation.Ellenwasdeadandperhapsdeathgaveanunderstandingofallthings.ReligionforbadefornicationonpainofhellfirebutiftheChurchthoughtshewasgoingtoleaveonestoneunturnedinsavingTaraandsavingthefamilyfromstarving—well,lettheChurchbotheraboutthat.Shewouldn’t.Atleast,notnow.AndAshley—Ashleydidn’twanther.Yes,hedidwanther.Thememoryofhiswarmmouthonherstoldherthat.Buthewouldnevertakeherawaywithhim.

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