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My First Dissipation

           Cruppsaid,well!wouldIonlycomeandlookattherange?Shecouldn’tsayfairerthanthat.WouldIcomeandlookatit?AsIshouldnothavebeenmuchthewiserifIHADlookedatit,Ideclined,andsaid,‘Nevermindfish.’ButMrs.Cruppsaid,Don’tsaythat;oysterswasin,whynotthem?SoTHATwassettled.Mrs.Cruppthensaidwhatshewouldrecommendwouldbethis.Apairofhotroastfowlsfromthepastry-cook’s;adishofstewedbeef,withvegetablesfromthepastry-cook’s;twolittlecornerthings,asaraisedpieandadishofkidneysfromthepastrycook’s;atart,and(ifIliked)ashapeofjellyfromthepastrycook’s.This,Mrs.Cruppsaid,wouldleaveheratfulllibertytoconcentratehermindonthepotatoes,andtoserveupthecheeseandceleryasshecouldwishtoseeitdone.

           IactedonMrs.Crupp’sopinion,andgavetheorderatthepastry-cook’smyself.WalkingalongtheStrand,afterwards,andobservingahardmottledsubstanceinthewindowofahamandbeefshop,whichresembledmarble,butwaslabelled‘MockTurtle’,Iwentinandboughtaslabofit,whichIhavesinceseenreasontobelievewouldhavesufficedforfifteenpeople.Thispreparation,Mrs.Crupp,aftersomedifficulty,consentedtowarmup;anditshrunksomuchinaliquidstate,thatwefounditwhatSteerforthcalled‘ratheratightfit’forfour.

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