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Chapter 3

           Buttherewasallthedifferenceintheworldbetweenthisplanningairilyawayfromthecanvasandactuallytakingherbrushandmakingthefirstmark.

           ShehadtakenthewrongbrushinheragitationatMr.Ramsay’spresence,andhereasel,rammedintotheearthsonervously,wasatthewrongangle.Andnowthatshehadputthatright,andinsodoinghadsubduedtheimpertinencesandirrelevancesthatpluckedherattentionandmadeherrememberhowshewassuchandsuchaperson,hadsuchandsuchrelationstopeople,shetookherhandandraisedherbrush.Foramomentitstayedtremblinginapainfulbutexcitingecstasyintheair.Wheretobegin?thatwasthequestionatwhatpointtomakethefirstmark?Onelineplacedonthecanvascommittedhertoinnumerablerisks,tofrequentandirrevocabledecisions.Allthatinideaseemedsimplebecameinpracticeimmediatelycomplex;asthewavesshapethemselvessymmetricallyfromtheclifftop,buttotheswimmeramongthemaredividedbysteepgulfs,andfoamingcrests.Stilltheriskmustberun;themarkmade.

           Withacuriousphysicalsensation,asifshewereurgedforwardandatthesametimemustholdherselfback,shemadeherfirstquickdecisivestroke.Thebrushdescended.Itflickeredbrownoverthewhitecanvas;itleftarunningmark.Asecondtimeshediditathirdtime.

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