Любовник леди Чаттерлей
Chapter 18
AndI’venobusinesstotakeawomanintomylife,unlessmylifedoessomethingandgetssomewhere,inwardlyatleast,tokeepusbothfresh.Amanmustofferawomansomemeaninginhislife,ifit’sgoingtobeanisolatedlife,andifshe’sagenuinewoman.Ican’tbejustyourmaleconcubine.’
’Whynot?’shesaid.
’Why,becauseIcan’t.Andyouwouldsoonhateit.’
’Asifyoucouldn’ttrustme,’shesaid.
Thegrinflickeredonhisface.
’Themoneyisyours,thepositionisyours,thedecisionswillliewithyou.I’mnotjustmyLady’sfucker,afterall.’
’Whatelseareyou?’
’Youmaywellask.Itnodoubtisinvisible.YetI’msomethingtomyselfatleast.Icanseethepointofmyownexistence,thoughIcanquiteunderstandnobodyelse’sseeingit.’
’Andwillyourexistencehavelesspoint,ifyoulivewithme?’
Hepausedalongtimebeforereplying:
’Itmight.’
Shetoostayedtothinkaboutit.
’Andwhatisthepointofyourexistence?’
’Itellyou,it’sinvisible.Idon’tbelieveintheworld,notinmoney,norinadvancement,norinthefutureofourcivilization.Ifthere’sgottobeafutureforhumanity,there’llhavetobeaverybigchangefromwhatnowis.’
’Andwhatwilltherealfuturehavetobelike?’
’Godknows!Icanfeelsomethinginsideme,allmixedupwithalotofrage.Butwhatitreallyamountsto,Idon’tknow.’
’ShallItellyou?’shesaid,lookingintohisface.’ShallItellyouwhatyouhavethatothermendon’thave,andthatwillmakethefuture?ShallItellyou?’
’Tellmethen,’hereplied.
