Любовник леди Чаттерлей
Chapter 18
’Butyoudon’twantmetogobacktoClifford,doyou?’sheaskedhim.
’Whatdoyouwantyourself?’hereplied.
’Iwanttolivewithyou,’shesaidsimply.
Inspiteofhimself,littleflamesranoverhisbellyasheheardhersayit,andhedroppedhishead.Thenhelookedupatheragain,withthosehauntedeyes.
’Ifit’sworthittoyou,’hesaid.’I’vegotnothing.’
’You’vegotmorethanmostmen.Come,youknowit,’shesaid.
’Inoneway,Iknowit.’Hewassilentforatime,thinking.Thenheresumed:’TheyusedtosayIhadtoomuchofthewomaninme.Butit’snotthat.I’mnotawomannotbecauseIdon’twanttoshootbirds,neitherbecauseIdon’twanttomakemoney,orgeton.Icouldhavegotoninthearmy,easily,butIdidn’tlikethearmy.ThoughIcouldmanagethemenallright:theylikedmeandtheyhadabitofaholyfearofmewhenIgotmad.No,itwasstupid,dead-handedhigherauthoritythatmadethearmydead:absolutelyfool-dead.Ilikemen,andmenlikeme.ButIcan’tstandthetwaddlingbossyimpudenceofthepeoplewhorunthisworld.That’swhyIcan’tgeton.Ihatetheimpudenceofmoney,andIhatetheimpudenceofclass.Sointheworldasitis,whathaveItoofferawoman?’
’Butwhyofferanything?It’snotabargain.It’sjustthatweloveoneanother,’shesaid.
’Nay,nay!It’smorethanthat.Livingismovingandmovingon.Mylifewon’tgodownthepropergutters,itjustwon’t.SoI’mabitofawasteticketbymyself.
