Скорбота сатани

Chapter 42

           AndIdidstayaway;—andevenwhenhismarriagewithDianaChesneytookplacewithgreatpompandsplendour,Irefusedhisinvitationtobepresent.Inthepublishedlistofguests,howeverwhichappearedintheprincipalpapers,Iwasscarcelysurprisedtoreadthenameof‘PrinceLucioRimânez.’

           Inowtookahumbleroomandsettoworkonanewliteraryenterprise,avoidingeveryoneIhadhithertoknown,forbeingnowalmostapoorman,Iwasawarethat‘swaggersociety’wishedtoblotmefromitsvisiting-list.Ilivedwithmyownsorrowfulthoughts—musingonmanythings,trainingmyselftohumility,obedience,andfaithwithfortitude—anddaybydayIdidbattlewiththemonster,Egotism,thatpresenteditselfinathousanddisguisesateveryturninmyownlifeaswellasinthelivesofothers.Ihadtore-formmycharacter—tomouldtheobstinatenaturethatrebelled,andmakeitsobstinacyservefortheattainmentofhigherobjectsthanworld’srenown—thetaskwasdifficult—butIgainedgroundalittlewitheveryfresheffort.

           Ihadlivedforsomemonthslikethisinbitterself-abasement,whenallthereadingworldwassuddenlyelectrifiedbyanotherbookofMavisClare’s.Mylatelyfavouredfirstworkwasagainforgottenandthrustaside—hers,slatedandscreamedatasusualbythecriticasters,wasbornealongtofamebyagreatwaveofhonestpublicpraiseandenthusiasm.

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