Ідіот

Chapter 10

           “Ah!youhavenotgone!”hesaid,whenhecaughtsightofhimatlast.“Youkeptonlaughingjustnow,becauseIthoughtofspeakingtothepeoplefromthewindowforaquarterofanhour.ButIamnoteighteen,youknow;lyingonthatbed,andlookingoutofthatwindow,Ihavethoughtofallsortsofthingsforsuchalongtimethat...adeadmanhasnoage,youknow.Iwassayingthattomyselfonlylastweek,whenIwasawakeinthenight.Doyouknowwhatyoufearmost?Youfearoursinceritymorethananything,althoughyoudespiseus!Theideacrossedmymindthatnight...YouthoughtIwasmakingfunofyoujustnow,LizabethaProkofievna?No,theideaofmockerywasfarfromme;Ionlymeanttopraiseyou.Coliatoldmetheprincecalledyouachild—verywell—butletmesee,Ihadsomethingelsetosay...”Hecoveredhisfacewithhishandsandtriedtocollecthisthoughts.

           “Ah,yes—youweregoingawayjustnow,andIthoughttomyself:‘Ishallneverseethesepeopleagain—neveragain!ThisisthelasttimeIshallseethetrees,too.IshallseenothingafterthisbuttheredbrickwallofMeyer’shouseoppositemywindow.Tellthemaboutit—trytotellthem,’Ithought.‘Hereisabeautifulyounggirl—youareadeadman;makethemunderstandthat.Tellthemthatadeadmanmaysayanything—andMrs.Grundywillnotbeangry—ha-ha!Youarenotlaughing?”Helookedanxiouslyaround.“ButyouknowIgetsomanyqueerideas,lyingthereinbed.

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