Ідіот

Chapter 5

           

           Hewastiredofsolitudenow;anewrushoffeelingtookholdofhim,andafloodoflightchasedawaythegloom,foramoment,fromhissoul.HetookatickettoPavlofsk,anddeterminedtogetthereasfastashecould,butsomethingstoppedhim;areality,andnotafantasy,ashewasinclinedtothinkit.Hewasabouttotakehisplaceinacarriage,whenhesuddenlythrewawayhisticketandcameoutagain,disturbedandthoughtful.Afewmomentslater,inthestreet,herecalledsomethingthathadbotheredhimalltheafternoon.Hecaughthimselfengagedinastrangeoccupationwhichhenowrecollectedhehadtakenupatoddmomentsforthelastfewhoursitwaslookingaboutallaroundhimforsomething,hedidnotknowwhat.Hehadforgottenitforawhile,halfanhourorso,andnow,suddenly,theuneasysearchhadrecommenced.

           Buthehadhardlybecomeconsciousofthiscuriousphenomenon,whenanotherrecollectionsuddenlyswamthroughhisbrain,interestinghimforthemoment,exceedingly.Herememberedthatthelasttimehehadbeenengagedinlookingaroundhimfortheunknownsomething,hewasstandingbeforeacutler’sshop,inthewindowofwhichwereexposedcertaingoodsforsale.Hewasextremelyanxiousnowtodiscoverwhetherthisshopandthesegoodsreallyexisted,orwhetherthewholethinghadbeenahallucination.

           Hefeltinaverycuriousconditiontoday,aconditionsimilartothatwhichhadprecededhisfitsinbygoneyears.

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