Червоне та чорне

A Girl’s Thoughts

           

           "IfallthisisnotaputupjobwithcomteNorbert,itisclearthatitismycoldlookswhichhavekindledthestrangelovewhichthisaristocraticgirlchoosestoentertainforme.IshouldbereallytoomuchofafoolifIeverallowedmyselftotakeafancytothatbigblondedoll."Thistrainofreasoninglefthimcolderandmorecalculatingthanhehadeverbeen.

           "Inthebattleforwhichwearepreparing,"headded,"prideofbirthwillbelikeahighhillwhichconstitutesamilitarypositionbetweenherandme.Thatmustbethefieldofthemanœuvres.ImadeagreatmistakeinstayinginParis;thispostponingofmydeparturecheapensandexposesme,ifallthisissimplyatrick.Whatdangerwasthereinleaving?Iftheyweremakingfunofme,Iwasmakingfunofthem.Ifherinterestformewasinanywayreal,Iwasmakingthatinterestahundredtimesmoreintense."

           MademoiselledelaMole’sletterhadgivenJulien’svanitysokeenapleasure,thatwreathedashewasinsmilesathisgoodfortunehehadforgottentothinkseriouslyabouttheproprietyofleaving.

           Itwasoneofthefatalelementsofhischaractertobeextremelysensitivetohisownweaknesses.Hewasextremelyupsetbythisone,andhadalmostforgottentheincrediblevictorywhichhadprecededthisslightcheck,whenaboutnineo’clockmademoiselledelaMoleappearedonthethresholdofthelibrary,flunghimaletterandranaway.

           "Sothisisgoingtobetheromancebyletters,"hesaidashepickeditup."Theenemymakesafalsemove;Iwillreplybycoldnessandvirtue.

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