Джэйн Эйр

Chapter XVIII

           Itseemedtomethat,wereIagentlemanlikehim,IwouldtaketomybosomonlysuchawifeasIcouldlove; buttheveryobviousnessoftheadvantagestothehusband’sownhappinessofferedbythisplanconvincedmethattheremustbeargumentsagainstitsgeneraladoptionofwhichIwasquiteignorant: otherwiseIfeltsurealltheworldwouldactasIwishedtoact. 

           Butinotherpoints,aswellasthis,Iwasgrowingverylenienttomymaster:Iwasforgettingallhisfaults,forwhichIhadoncekeptasharplook-out. Ithadformerlybeenmyendeavourtostudyallsidesofhischaracter:totakethebadwiththegood;andfromthejustweighingofboth,toformanequitablejudgment. NowIsawnobad. Thesarcasmthathadrepelled,theharshnessthathadstartledmeonce,wereonlylikekeencondimentsinachoicedish:theirpresencewaspungent,buttheirabsencewouldbefeltascomparativelyinsipid. Andasforthevaguesomethingwasitasinisterorasorrowful,adesigningoradespondingexpression?thatopeneduponacarefulobserver,nowandthen,inhiseye,andclosedagainbeforeonecouldfathomthestrangedepthpartiallydisclosed; thatsomethingwhichusedtomakemefearandshrink,asifIhadbeenwanderingamongstvolcanic-lookinghills,andhadsuddenlyfeltthegroundquiverandseenitgape:thatsomething,I,atintervals,beheldstill;andwiththrobbingheart,butnotwithpalsiednerves.Insteadofwishingtoshun,Ilongedonlytodaretodivineit; 

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