Емма

Chapter 14

           Knightleyremainedwiththem,Emma’sfevercontinued;butwhenhewasgone,shebegantobealittletranquillisedandsubdued—andinthecourseofthesleeplessnight,whichwasthetaxforsuchanevening,shefoundoneortwosuchveryseriouspointstoconsider,asmadeherfeel,thatevenherhappinessmusthavesomealloy.Herfather—andHarriet.Shecouldnotbealonewithoutfeelingthefullweightoftheirseparateclaims;andhowtoguardthecomfortofbothtotheutmost,wasthequestion.Withrespecttoherfather,itwasaquestionsoonanswered.ShehardlyknewyetwhatMr.Knightleywouldask;butaveryshortparleywithherownheartproducedthemostsolemnresolutionofneverquittingherfather.—Sheevenweptovertheideaofit,asasinofthought.Whilehelived,itmustbeonlyanengagement;butsheflatteredherself,thatifdivestedofthedangerofdrawingheraway,itmightbecomeanincreaseofcomforttohim.—HowtodoherbestbyHarriet,wasofmoredifficultdecision—howtospareherfromanyunnecessarypain;howtomakeheranypossibleatonement;howtoappearleastherenemy?—Onthesesubjects,herperplexityanddistresswereverygreat—andhermindhadtopassagainandagainthrougheverybitterreproachandsorrowfulregretthathadeversurroundedit.

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