Joey

           Wisechildrenalwayschooseamotherwhowasashockingflirtinhermaidendays,andsohadseveraloffersbeforesheacceptedtheirfortunatepapa.Thereasontheydothisisbecauseeveryofferrefusedbytheirmothermeansanotherpantomimetothem.Youseeyoucan’ttrusttoyourfather’stakingyoutothepantomime,butyoucantrusttoeveryoneofthepoorfrenziedgentlemenforwhomthatladyhasweptadeliciouslittletearonherlovelylittlecambrichandkerchief.Itispretty(butdreadfullyaffecting)toseethemonBoxingNightgatheringtogetherthebabiesoftheiroldloves.Someknockatbutonedoorandbringahansom,butothersgofromstreettostreetinprivate’buses,andevenwearfalsenosestoconcealthesufferingsyouinflictuponthemasyougrewmoreandmorelikeyoursweetcruelmamma.

           SoItookDavidtothepantomime,andIhopeyoufollowmyreasoning,forIdon’t.Hewentwiththefairestanticipations,pausingonthethresholdtopeerthroughtheholeinthelittlehousecalled“PayHere,”whichhethoughtwasRedRidingHood’sresidence,andaskedpolitelywhetherhemightseeher,buttheysaidshehadgonetothewood,anditwasquitetrue,forthereshewasinthewoodgatheringastickforhergrandmother’sfire.ShesangabeautifulsongabouttheBoysandtheirdashingways,whichflatteredDavidconsiderably,butsheforgottotakeawaythestickafterall.Otherpartsoftheplaywerenotsonice,butDavidthoughtitalllovely,hereallydid.

           Yethelefttheplaceintears.