Холодный дом

Sharpshooters

           ""HowoldAREyou,Phil?"asksthetrooper,pausingasheconveyshissmokingsaucertohislips."I’msomethingwithaeightinit,"saysPhil."Itcan’tbeeighty.Noryeteighteen.It’sbetwixt’em,somewheres."Mr.George,slowlyputtingdownhissaucerwithouttastingitscontents,islaughinglybeginning,"Why,whatthedeuce,Phil"whenhestops,seeingthatPhiliscountingonhisdirtyfingers."Iwasjusteight,"saysPhil,"agreeabletotheparishcalculation,whenIwentwiththetinker.Iwassentonaerrand,andIseehima-sittinunderaoldbuildinwithafirealltohimselfwerycomfortable,andhesays,’Wouldyouliketocomealongame,myman?’Isays’Yes,’andhimandmeandthefiregoeshometoClerkenwelltogether.ThatwasAprilFoolDay.Iwasabletocountuptoten;andwhenAprilFoolDaycomeroundagain,Isaystomyself,’Now,oldchap,you’reoneandaeightinit.’AprilFoolDayafterthat,Isays,’Now,oldchap,you’retwoandaeightinit.’Incourseoftime,Icometotenandaeightinit;twotensandaeightinit.Whenitgotsohigh,itgottheupperhandofme,butthisishowIalwaysknowthere’saeightinit.""Ah!"saysMr.George,resuminghisbreakfast."Andwhere’sthetinker?""Drinkputhiminthehospital,guv’ner,andthehospitalputhiminaglass-case,IHAVEheerd,"Philrepliesmysteriously."Bythatmeansyougotpromotion?Tookthebusiness,Phil?""Yes,commander,Itookthebusiness.Suchasitwas.

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