Холодный дом

Esther’s Narrative

           "ButevenAda,withherlovingface—andifithadseemedinnocentandtrustingwhenIfirstsawitinthatmemorableNovemberfog,howmuchmorediditseemnowwhenIknewherinnocentandtrustingheart—evenAdashookherheadatthisandlookedserious.SoIthoughtitagoodopportunitytohinttoRichardthatifheweresometimesalittlecarelessofhimself,IwasverysurehenevermeanttobecarelessofAda,andthatitwasapartofhisaffectionateconsiderationforhernottoslighttheimportanceofastepthatmightinfluenceboththeirlives.Thismadehimalmostgrave."MydearMotherHubbard,"hesaid,"that’stheverything!Ihavethoughtofthatseveraltimesandhavebeenquiteangrywithmyselfformeaningtobesomuchinearnestand—somehow—notexactlybeingso.Idon’tknowhowitis;Iseemtowantsomethingorothertostandby.EvenyouhavenoideahowfondIamofAda(mydarlingcousin,Iloveyou,somuch!),butIdon’tsettledowntoconstancyinotherthings.It’ssuchuphillwork,andittakessuchatime!"saidRichardwithanairofvexation."Thatmaybe,"Isuggested,"becauseyoudon’tlikewhatyouhavechosen.""Poorfellow!"saidAda."IamsureIdon’twonderatit!"No.Itwasnotoftheleastusemytryingtolookwise.

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