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Chapter 12
Isheactuallysoutterlyindifferentformylife?"
"Why,ma’am,"Ianswered,"themasterhasnoideaofyourbeingderanged;andofcoursehedoesnotfearthatyouwillletyourselfdieofhunger."
"Youthinknot?CannotyoutellhimIwill?"shereturned."Persuadehim!speakofyourownmind:sayyouarecertainIwill!"
"No,youforget,Mrs.Linton,"Isuggested,"thatyouhaveeatensomefoodwitharelishthisevening,andtomorrowyouwillperceiveitsgoodeffects."
"IfIwereonlysureitwouldkillhim,"sheinterrupted."I’dkillmyselfdirectly!Thesethreeawfulnights,I’veneverclosedmylids—andoh,I’vebeentormented!I’vebeenhaunted,Nelly!ButIbegintofancyyoudon’tlikeme.Howstrange!Ithought,thougheverybodyhatedanddespisedeachother,theycouldnotavoidlovingme.Andtheyhaveallturnedtoenemiesinafewhours:theyhave,I’mpositive;thepeoplehere.Howdrearytomeetdeath,surroundedbytheircoldfaces.Isabellaterrifiedandrepelled,afraidtoentertheroom,itwouldbesodreadfultowatchCatherinego.AndEdgarstandingsolemnlybytoseeitover;thenofferingprayersofthankstoGodforrestoringpeacetohishouse,andgoingbacktohisbooks!Whatinthenameofallthatfeelshashetodowithbooks,whenIamdying?"
ShecouldnotbearthenotionwhichIhadputintoherheadofMr.Linton’sphilosophicalresignation.