Джэйн Эйр

Chapter XXXIV

           "Iftheyarereallyqualifiedforthetask,willnottheirownheartsbethefirsttoinformthemofit?" 

           Ifeltasifanawfulcharmwasframingroundandgatheringoverme:Itrembledtohearsomefatalwordspokenwhichwouldatoncedeclareandrivetthespell. 

           "Andwhatdoesyourheartsay?"demandedSt.John. 

           "Myheartismute,myheartismute,"Ianswered,struckandthrilled. 

           "ThenImustspeakforit,"continuedthedeep,relentlessvoice."Jane,comewithmetoIndia:comeasmyhelpmeetandfellow-labourer." 

           Theglenandskyspunround:thehillsheaved!ItwasasifIhadheardasummonsfromHeavenasifavisionarymessenger,likehimofMacedonia,hadenounced,"Comeoverandhelpus!" ButIwasnoapostle,Icouldnotbeholdtheherald,Icouldnotreceivehiscall. 

           "Oh,St.John!"Icried,"havesomemercy!" 

           Iappealedtoonewho,inthedischargeofwhathebelievedhisduty,knewneithermercynorremorse.Hecontinued 

           "Godandnatureintendedyouforamissionary’swife.Itisnotpersonal,butmentalendowmentstheyhavegivenyou:youareformedforlabour,notforlove. Amissionary’swifeyoumustshallbe. Youshallbemine:Iclaimyounotformypleasure,butformySovereign’sservice." 

           "Iamnotfitforit:Ihavenovocation,"Isaid. 

           Hehadcalculatedonthesefirstobjections:hewasnotirritatedbythem. 

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