Мидлмарч

Chapter 73

           Asitwas,hehadrestedintheconsiderationthatdisobediencetohisorders,howeveritmighthavearisen,couldnotbeconsideredacrime,thatinthedominantopinionobediencetohisorderswasjustaslikelytobefatal,andthattheaffairwassimplyoneofetiquette.Whereas,againandagain,inhistimeoffreedom,hehaddenouncedtheperversionofpathologicaldoubtintomoraldoubtandhadsaid"thepurestexperimentintreatmentmaystillbeconscientious:mybusinessistotakecareoflife,andtodothebestIcanthinkofforit.Scienceisproperlymorescrupulousthandogma.Dogmagivesachartertomistake,buttheverybreathofscienceisacontestwithmistake,andmustkeeptheconsciencealive."Alas!thescientificconsciencehadgotintothedebasingcompanyofmoneyobligationandselfishrespects.

           "IsthereamedicalmanofthemallinMiddlemarchwhowouldquestionhimselfasIdo?"saidpoorLydgate,witharenewedoutburstofrebellionagainsttheoppressionofhislot."Andyettheywillallfeelwarrantedinmakingawidespacebetweenmeandthem,asifIwerealeper!MypracticeandmyreputationareutterlydamnedIcanseethat.EvenifIcouldbeclearedbyvalidevidence,itwouldmakelittledifferencetotheblessedworldhere.Ihavebeensetdownastaintedandshouldbecheapenedtothemallthesame.

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