Мидлмарч

Chapter 73

           Thereareepisodesinmostmen’slivesinwhichtheirhighestqualitiescanonlycastadeterringshadowovertheobjectsthatfilltheirinwardvision:Lydgate’stenderheartednesswaspresentjustthenonlyasadreadlestheshouldoffendagainstit,notasanemotionthatswayedhimtotenderness.Forhewasverymiserable.Onlythosewhoknowthesupremacyoftheintellectuallife—thelifewhichhasaseedofennoblingthoughtandpurposewithinit—canunderstandthegriefofonewhofallsfromthatsereneactivityintotheabsorbingsoul-wastingstrugglewithworldlyannoyances.

           Howwashetoliveonwithoutvindicatinghimselfamongpeoplewhosuspectedhimofbaseness?HowcouldhegosilentlyawayfromMiddlemarchasifhewereretreatingbeforeajustcondemnation?Andyethowwashetosetaboutvindicatinghimself?

           Forthatsceneatthemeeting,whichhehadjustwitnessed,althoughithadtoldhimnoparticulars,hadbeenenoughtomakehisownsituationthoroughlycleartohim.BulstrodehadbeenindreadofscandalousdisclosuresonthepartofRaffles.Lydgatecouldnowconstructalltheprobabilitiesofthecase."Hewasafraidofsomebetrayalinmyhearing:allhewantedwastobindmetohimbyastrongobligation:thatwaswhyhepassedonasuddenfromhardnesstoliberality.Andhemayhavetamperedwiththepatient—hemayhavedisobeyedmyorders.Ifearhedid.

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