Мертві душі

           Onlywhenplayingacourtcardwasithiscustomtostrikethetablewithhisfist,andtoexclaim(ifthecardhappenedtobeaqueen),“Now,oldpopadia7!”and(ifthecardhappenedtobeaking),“Now,peasantofTambov!”TowhichejaculationsinvariablythePresidentoftheLocalCouncilretorted,“Ah,Ihavehimbytheears,Ihavehimbytheears!”Andfromtheneighbourhoodofthetableotherstrongejaculationsrelativetotheplaywouldarise,interposedwithoneoranotherofthosenicknameswhichparticipantsinagameareapttoapplytomembersofthevarioussuits.Ineedhardlyaddthat,thegameover,theplayersfelltoquarrelling,andthatinthedisputeourfriendjoined,thoughsoartfullyastoleteveryoneseethat,inspiteofthefactthathewaswrangling,hewasdoingsoonlyinthemostamicablefashionpossible.Neverdidhesayoutright,“Youplayedthewrongcardatsuchandsuchapoint.”No,healwaysemployedsomesuchphraseas,“Youpermittedyourselftomakeaslip,andthusaffordedmethehonourofcoveringyourdeuce.”Indeed,thebettertokeepinaccordwithhisantagonists,hekeptofferingthemhissilver-enamelledsnuff-box(atthebottomofwhichlayacoupleofviolets,placedthereforthesakeoftheirscent).InparticulardidthenewcomerpayattentiontolandownersManilovandSobakevitch;somuchsothathishastetoarriveongoodtermswiththemledtohisleavingthePresidentandthePostmasterratherintheshade.