По цей бік раю
Experiments in Convalescence
Hehadtakenthemostviolent,iftheweakest,methodtoshieldhimselffromthestabsofmemory,andwhileitwasnotacoursehewouldhaveprescribedforothers,hefoundintheendthatithaddoneitsbusiness:hewasoverthefirstflushofpain.
Don’tmisunderstand!AmoryhadlovedRosalindashewouldneverloveanotherlivingperson.Shehadtakenthefirstflushofhisyouthandbroughtfromhisunplumbeddepthstendernessthathadsurprisedhim,gentlenessandunselfishnessthathehadnevergiventoanothercreature.Hehadlaterlove-affairs,butofadifferentsort:inthosehewentbacktothat,perhaps,moretypicalframeofmind,inwhichthegirlbecamethemirrorofamoodinhim.Rosalindhaddrawnoutwhatwasmorethanpassionateadmiration;hehadadeep,undyingaffectionforRosalind.
Buttherehadbeen,neartheend,somuchdramatictragedy,culminatinginthearabesquenightmareofhisthreeweeks’spree,thathewasemotionallywornout.Thepeopleandsurroundingsthatherememberedasbeingcoolordelicatelyartificial,seemedtopromisehimarefuge.Hewroteacynicalstorywhichfeaturedhisfather’sfuneralanddespatchedittoamagazine,receivinginreturnacheckforsixtydollarsandarequestformoreofthesametone.Thistickledhisvanity,butinspiredhimtonofurthereffort.
Hereadenormously.
