Короли и капуста

           Iamthevillaininthethirdact;andImusthavemymerited,ifonlytemporary,triumph.Isawyoucollarthelatepresident’svalisefulofboodle.Oh,Iknowit’sblackmail;butI’mliberalabouttheprice.IknowI’macheapvillain—oneoftheregularsawmill-dramakind—butyou’reoneofmyparticularfriends,andIdon’twanttostickyouhard."

           "Supposeyougointothedetails,"suggestedGoodwin,calmlyarranginghislettersonthetable.

           "Allright,"said"Beelzebub.""Ilikethewayyoutakeit.Idespisehistrionics;soyouwillpleaseprepareyourselfforthefactswithoutanyredfire,calciumorgracenotesonthesaxophone.

           "OnthenightthatHisFly-by-nightExcellencyarrivedintownIwasverydrunk.YouwillexcusethepridewithwhichIstatethatfact;butitwasquiteafeatformetoattainthatdesirablestate.SomebodyhadleftacotoutundertheorangetreesintheyardofMadamaOrtiz’shotel.Isteppedoverthewall,laiddownuponit,andfellasleep.Iwasawakenedbyanorangethatdroppedfromthetreeuponmynose;andIlaidthereforawhilecursingSirIsaacNewton,orwhoeveritwasthatinventedgravitation,fornotconfininghistheorytoapples.

           "AndthenalongcameMr.Mirafloresandhistrue-lovewiththetreasuryinavalise,andwentintothehotel.Nextyouhoveinsight,andheldapow-wowwiththetonsorialartistwhoinsistedupontalkingshopafterhours.Itriedtoslumberagain;butoncemoremyrestwasdisturbed—thistimebythenoiseofthepopgunthatwentoffupstairs.