Волны
Ishallpushthefortunesofmychildrenunscrupulously.Ishallhatethosewhoseetheirfaults.Ishallliebaselytohelpthem.Ishallletthemwallmeawayfromyou,fromyouandfromyou.Also,Iamtornwithjealousy.IhateJinnybecausesheshowsmethatmyhandsarered,mynailsbitten.Ilovewithsuchferocitythatitkillsmewhentheobjectofmyloveshowsbyaphrasethathecanescape.Heescapes,andIamleftclutchingatastringthatslipsinandoutamongtheleavesonthetree-tops.Idonotunderstandphrases.’
’HadIbeenborn,’saidBernard,’notknowingthatonewordfollowsanotherImighthavebeen,whoknows,perhapsanything.Asitis,findingsequenceseverywhere,Icannotbearthepressureofsolitude.WhenIcannotseewordscurlinglikeringsofsmokeroundmeIamindarkness--Iamnothing.WhenIamaloneIfallintolethargy,andsaytomyselfdismallyasIpokethecindersthroughthebarsofthegrate,MrsMoffatwillcome.Shewillcomeandsweepitallup.WhenLouisisaloneheseeswithastonishingintensity,andwillwritesomewordsthatmayoutlastusall.Rhodalovestobealone.Shefearsusbecauseweshatterthesenseofbeingwhichissoextremeinsolitude--seehowshegraspsherfork--herweaponagainstus.ButIonlycomeintoexistencewhentheplumber,orthehorse-dealer,orwhoeveritmaybe,sayssomethingwhichsetsmealight.Thenhowlovelythesmokeofmyphraseis,risingandfalling,flauntingandfalling,uponredlobstersandyellowfruit,wreathingthemintoonebeauty.
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