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Chapter 24
IfeltIcoulddragmyselfbutlittlefarther;prettysoon,Imustliedownanddieonthesewetmountainslikeasheeporafox,andmybonesmustwhitentherelikethebonesofabeast.Myheadwaslightperhaps;butIbegantolovetheprospect,Ibegantogloryinthethoughtofsuchadeath,aloneinthedesert,withthewildeaglesbesiegingmylastmoments.Alanwouldrepentthen,Ithought;hewouldremember,whenIwasdead,howmuchheowedme,andtheremembrancewouldbetorture.SoIwentlikeasick,silly,andbad-heartedschoolboy,feedingmyangeragainstafellow-man,whenIwouldhavebeenbetteronmyknees,cryingonGodformercy.AndateachofAlan’staunts,Ihuggedmyself.“Ah!”thinksItomyself,“Ihaveabettertauntinreadiness;whenIliedownanddie,youwillfeelitlikeabuffetinyourface;ah,whatarevenge!ah,howyouwillregretyouringratitudeandcruelty!”
Allthewhile,Iwasgrowingworseandworse.OnceIhadfallen,mylegsimplydoublingunderme,andthishadstruckAlanforthemoment;butIwasafootsobriskly,andsetoffagainwithsuchanaturalmanner,thathesoonforgottheincident.Flushesofheatwentoverme,andthenspasmsofshuddering.Thestitchinmysidewashardlybearable.AtlastIbegantofeelthatIcouldtrailmyselfnofarther:andwiththat,therecameonmeallatoncethewishtohaveitoutwithAlan,letmyangerblaze,andbedonewithmylifeinamoresuddenmanner.Hehadjustcalledme“Whig.”Istopped.
“Mr.