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Containing the Story of the Bagman’s Uncle

           Afewoillampswerescatteredatlongdistances,buttheyonlyservedtomarkthedirtyentrancetosomenarrowclose,ortoshowwhereacommonstaircommunicated,bysteepandintricatewindings,withthevariousflatsabove.Glancingatallthesethingswiththeairofamanwhohadseenthemtoooftenbefore,tothinkthemworthyofmuchnoticenow,myunclewalkedupthemiddleofthestreet,withathumbineachwaistcoatpocket,indulgingfromtimetotimeinvarioussnatchesofsong,chantedforthwithsuchgood-willandspirit,thatthequiethonestfolkstartedfromtheirfirstsleepandlaytremblinginbedtillthesounddiedawayinthedistance;when,satisfyingthemselvesthatitwasonlysomedrunkenne’er-do-weelfindinghiswayhome,theycoveredthemselvesupwarmandfellasleepagain.

           ‘Iamparticularindescribinghowmyunclewalkedupthemiddleofthestreet,withhisthumbsinhiswaistcoatpockets,gentlemen,because,asheoftenusedtosay(andwithgreatreasontoo)thereisnothingatallextraordinaryinthisstory,unlessyoudistinctlyunderstandatthebeginning,thathewasnotbyanymeansofamarvellousorromanticturn.

           ‘Gentlemen,myunclewalkedonwithhisthumbsinhiswaistcoatpockets,takingthemiddleofthestreettohimself,andsinging,nowaverseofalovesong,andthenaverseofadrinkingone,andwhenhewastiredofboth,whistlingmelodiously,untilhereachedtheNorthBridge,which,atthispoint,connectstheoldandnewtownsofEdinburgh.

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