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21. The College of Athletic Arts

           

           ButitsohappenedthatProfessorWogglebug(whohadinventedsomuchthathehadacquiredthehabit)carelesslyinventedaSquare-MealTablet,whichwasnobiggerthanyourlittlefinger-nailbutcontained,incondensedform,theequalofabowlofsoup,aportionoffriedfish,aroast,asaladandadessert,allofwhichgavethesamenourishmentasasquaremeal.

           TheProfessorwassoproudoftheseSquare-MealTabletsthathebegantofeedthemtothestudentsathiscollege,insteadofotherfood,buttheboysandgirlsobjectedbecausetheywantedfoodthattheycouldenjoythetasteof.Itwasnofunatalltoswallowatablet,withaglassofwater,andcallitadinner;sotheyrefusedtoeattheSquare-MealTablets.ProfessorWogglebuginsisted,andtheresultwasthattheSeniorClassseizedthelearnedProfessoronedayandthrewhimintotheriver—clothesandall.Everyoneknowsthatawogglebugcannotswim,andsotheinventorofthewonderfulSquare-MealTabletslayhelplessonthebottomoftheriverforthreedaysbeforeafishermancaughtoneofhislegsonafishhookanddraggedhimoutuponthebank.

           ThelearnedProfessorwasnaturallyindignantatsuchtreatment,andsohebroughttheentireSeniorClasstotheEmeraldCityandappealedtoOzmaofOztopunishthemfortheirrebellion.

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