Пробний камінь
VIII
Shesatnearlyoppositehim,atFlamel’sside,anditappearedtoGlennardthattheyhadbuiltaboutthemselvesoneofthoseairybarriersoftalkbehindwhichtwopeoplecansaywhattheyplease.Whilethereadingwasdiscussedtheyweresilent.TheirsilenceseemedtoGlennardalmostcynical—itstrippedthelastdisguisefromtheircomplicity.Athrobofangerroseinhim,butsuddenlyitfell,andhefelt,withacurioussenseofrelief,thatatbottomhenolongercaredwhetherFlamelhadtoldhiswifeornot.TheassumptionthatFlamelknewaboutthelettershadbecomeafacttoGlennard;anditnowseemedtohimbetterthatAlexashouldknowtoo.
Hewasfrightenedatfirstbythediscoveryofhisownindifference.Thelastbarriersofhiswillseemedtobebreakingdownbeforeafloodofmorallassitude.Howcouldhecontinuetoplayhispart,tokeephisfronttotheenemy,withthispoisonofindifferencestealingthroughhisveins?Hetriedtobracehimselfwiththeremembranceofhiswife’sscorn.Hehadnotforgottenthenoteonwhichtheirconversationhadclosed.Ifhehadeverwonderedhowshewouldreceivethetruthhewonderednolonger—shewoulddespisehim.Butthislentanewinsidiousnesstohistemptation,sincehercontemptwouldbearefugefromhisown.Hesaidtohimselfthat,sincehenolongercaredfortheconsequences,hecouldatleastacquithimselfofspeakinginself-defence.Whathewantednowwasnotimmunitybutcastigation:hiswife’sindignationmightstillreconcilehimtohimself
