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Dayafterdayaswesatatteaweobservedthesesights.
’Butwewerealldifferent.Thewax--thevirginalwaxthatcoatsthespinemeltedindifferentpatchesforeachofus.Thegrowloftheboot-boymakinglovetothetweenyamongthegooseberrybushes;theclothesblownouthardontheline;thedeadmaninthegutter;theappletree,starkinthemoonlight;theratswarmingwithmaggots;thelustredrippingblue--ourwhitewaxwasstreakedandstainedbyeachofthesedifferently.Louiswasdisgustedbythenatureofhumanflesh;Rhodabyourcruelty;Susancouldnotshare;Nevillewantedorder;Jinnylove;andsoon.Wesufferedterriblyaswebecameseparatebodies.
’YetIwaspreservedfromtheseexcessesandhavesurvivedmanyofmyfriends,amalittlestout,grey,rubbedonthethoraxasitwere,becauseitisthepanoramaoflife,seennotfromtheroof,butfromthethird-storeywindow,thatdelightsme,notwhatonewomansaystooneman,evenifthatmanismyself.HowcouldIbebulliedatschooltherefore?Howcouldtheymakethingshotforme?TherewastheDoctorlurchingintochapel,asifhetrodabattleshipinagaleofwind,shoutingouthiscommandsthroughamegaphone,sincepeopleinauthorityalwaysbecomemelodramatic--IdidnothatehimlikeNeville,orreverehimlikeLouis.Itooknotesaswesattogetherinchapel.Therewerepillars,shadows,memorialbrasses,boysscufflingandswoppingstampsbehindPrayerBooks;thesoundofarustypump;theDoctorbooming,aboutimmortalityandquittingourselveslikemen;andPercivalscratchinghisthigh.
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