Портрет Доріана Грея
Chapter 7
No;shehaddiedforloveofhim,andlovewouldalwaysbeasacramenttohimnow. Shehadatonedforeverything,bythesacrificeshehadmadeofherlife. Hewouldnotthinkanymoreofwhatshehadmadehimgothrough,onthathorriblenightatthetheatre. Whenhethoughtofher,itwouldbeasawonderfultragicfiguresentontotheworld’sstagetoshowthesupremerealityofLove. Awonderfultragicfigure? Tearscametohiseyesasherememberedherchildlikelook,andwinsomefancifulways,andshytremulousgrace. Hebrushedthemawayhastily,andlookedagainatthepicture.
Hefeltthatthetimehadreallycomeformakinghischoice. Orhadhischoicealreadybeenmade? Yes,lifehaddecidedthatforhim—life,andhisowninfinitecuriosityaboutlife. Eternalyouth,infinitepassion,pleasuressubtleandsecret,wildjoysandwildersins—hewastohaveallthesethings. Theportraitwastobeartheburdenofhisshame:thatwasall.
Afeelingofpaincreptoverhimashethoughtofthedesecrationthatwasinstoreforthefairfaceonthecanvas. Once,inboyishmockeryofNarcissus,hehadkissed,orfeignedtokiss,thosepaintedlipsthatnowsmiledsocruellyathim. Morningaftermorninghehadsatbeforetheportrait,wonderingatitsbeauty,almostenamouredofit,asitseemedtohimattimes. Wasittoalternowwitheverymoodtowhichheyielded? Wasittobecomeamonstrousandloathsomething,tobehiddenawayinalockedroom,tobeshutoutfromthesunlightthathadsooftentouchedtobrightergoldthewavingwonderofitshair? Thepityofit! thepityofit!
Foramomenthethoughtofprayingthatthehorriblesympathythatexistedbetweenhimandthepicturemightcease. Ithadchangedinanswertoaprayer;perhapsinanswertoaprayeritmightremainunchanged.