Мідлмарч

Chapter 76

           "

           "Ithurtsmeverymuchtohearyouspeaksohopelessly,"saidDorothea."Itwouldbeahappinesstoyourfriends,whobelieveinyourfuture,inyourpowertodogreatthings,ifyouwouldletthemsaveyoufromthat.ThinkhowmuchmoneyIhave;itwouldbeliketakingaburthenfrommeifyoutooksomeofiteveryyeartillyougotfreefromthisfetteringwantofincome.Whyshouldnotpeopledothesethings?Itissodifficulttomakesharesatalleven.Thisisoneway."

           "Godblessyou,Mrs.Casaubon!"saidLydgate,risingasifwiththesameimpulsethatmadehiswordsenergetic,andrestinghisarmonthebackofthegreatleatherchairhehadbeensittingin."Itisgoodthatyoushouldhavesuchfeelings.ButIamnotthemanwhooughttoallowhimselftobenefitbythem.Ihavenotgivenguaranteesenough.ImustnotatleastsinkintothedegradationofbeingpensionedforworkthatIneverachieved.ItisverycleartomethatImustnotcountonanythingelsethangettingawayfromMiddlemarchassoonasIcanmanageit.Ishouldnotbeableforalongwhile,attheverybest,togetanincomehere,andanditiseasiertomakenecessarychangesinanewplace.Imustdoasothermendo,andthinkwhatwillpleasetheworldandbringinmoney;lookforalittleopeningintheLondoncrowd,andpushmyself;setupinawatering-place,orgotosomesoutherntownwherethereareplentyofidleEnglish,andgetmyselfpuffedthatisthesortofshellImustcreepintoandtrytokeepmysoulalivein.

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