Тінь над Іннсмутом
Chapter 8
Butduringthedreamstheydidnothorrifymeatall—Iwasonewiththem;wearingtheirunhumantrappings,treadingtheiraqueousways,andprayingmonstrouslyattheirevilsea-bottomtemples.
TherewasmuchmorethanIcouldremember,butevenwhatIdidremembereachmorningwouldbeenoughtostampmeasamadmanorageniusifeverIdaredwriteitdown.Somefrightfulinfluence,Ifelt,wasseekinggraduallytodragmeoutofthesaneworldofwholesomelifeintounnamableabyssesofblacknessandalienage;andtheprocesstoldheavilyonme.Myhealthandappearancegrewsteadilyworse,tillfinallyIwasforcedtogiveupmypositionandadoptthestatic,secludedlifeofaninvalid.Someoddnervousafflictionhadmeinitsgrip,andIfoundmyselfattimesalmostunabletoshutmyeyes.
ItwasthenthatIbegantostudythemirrorwithmountingalarm.Theslowravagesofdiseasearenotpleasanttowatch,butinmycasetherewassomethingsubtlerandmorepuzzlinginthebackground.Myfatherseemedtonoticeit,too,forhebeganlookingatmecuriouslyandalmostaffrightedly.Whatwastakingplaceinme?CoulditbethatIwascomingtoresemblemygrandmotheranduncleDouglas?
OnenightIhadafrightfuldreaminwhichImetmygrandmotherunderthesea.Shelivedinaphosphorescentpalaceofmanyterraces,withgardensofstrangeleprouscoralsandgrotesquebrachiateefflorescences,andwelcomedmewithawarmththatmayhavebeensardonic.Shehadchanged—asthosewhotaketothewaterchange—andtoldmeshehadneverdied.